Author Interview: Terry Wilson

Q&A: Confessions of a Failed Saint

Terry Wilson has written a book both funny and touching, in an engaging style with a flair for

humor. Her collection of essays is a kaleidoscope memoir revealing  her toughness and vulnerability, a combination that has served her well as a stand-up comic and actress. Her spiritual journey reveals a woman with solid core values enriched by experience. She has been published in The Santa Fe Reporter and Santa Fe Literary Review, and nationally in Artemis Literary Journal and Silverleaf Humor Anthology, among others. Her honesty is refreshing, her storytelling right on. The book is a quick and fun read. Below are her responses to questions about her work.

H. What is your background?

TW. I have been writing for many years, and I’m also a performer. I used to be an actress and have also presented two one-woman shows, the most recent being Confessions of a Failed Saint, a show I wrote and performed at El Museo Cultural in Santa Fe, N.M. I also did stand up comedy when I lived in Los Angeles. In addition, I have taught English and creative writing at Santa Fe Community College for the past 21 years. I think of myself as a writer and an entertainer.

H. Confessions of a Failed Saint is a memoir. Talk about the title.

TW. Confessions of a Failed Saint is a title I came up with because it seemed so impossible, growing up Catholic. As I say in my book, “I could never get Jesus off the cross, for one thing.” I always had this sense that I couldn’t do enough to be as holy as my mom wanted me to be. And this is why I originally decided to be a nun because if I gave up my whole life, maybe that would get me into heaven and get Mom to love me. Being a saint, though, was the main thing—they were the ones who had the ticket into being best friends with God. The only problem was, being a saint usually involved martyrdom, which was hard to achieve when I was only seven. Or even 47!  It’s a drag to not be perfect, but at least I’m a failed saint. And this might get me into Limbo. 

H. This appears to be a “work in progress” in that you wrote the essays over time. The book is a collection. Talk about the process and how you selected the topics?

TW. Selecting the essays for my book was tricky. I love the writing process, so I had many pieces to choose from. But structuring the book was more difficult. Each editor I consulted had a different idea of what should be included. Finally I decided the main thrust of the book would be how I tried to find spirituality in my own life, and the comical situations that ensued. Sean Murphy was the editor that helped me with line by line editing, and then Miriam Sagan helped me eliminate the essays that didn’t seem to fit with the arc of the story.

H. How has your family reacted to you writing in such a personal way about your life? 

TW. Only a small portion of my family knows about this book—so far! I plan to tell them slowly (and individually) since some of the essays are rather personal. The family members I have talked to so far, however, are supportive and glad I’m bringing up some old secrets that need to be discussed. Whether all of my family will embrace my book remains to be seen. But I had to write it anyway because it’s my truth. As Natalie Goldberg once said, “The writer is the bravest part of me.”

H.  The hardest thing is watching a parent decline. I love the tenderness with which you write about your mother. Why was it important for you to include these pieces of your mother’s life?

TW. It was important for me to include Mom’s dementia in this book because we have all lived with it for so long—the past 15 years or more. And also because in her dementia, I have seen a softening of the toughness with which she always approached life. It’s allowed me to get closer to her. When she was younger, I was never allowed to touch her face or massage her neck or even wash her hair—she got irritated if we got too close. Only in her later years has she let some of those defenses go. Now when I put my cheek against hers, even if she doesn’t remember who I am, we’re just two human beings loving each other. 

H. Much of what you write is funny, and yet there is an underlying message of hope and wisdom. Talk about the process of writing a memoir and turning difficult moments into humorous reflections.

TW. I think there is a part of me that is always an observer, so even in a painful situation, I can often see the humor in it—though sometimes it takes awhile to laugh about one of these experiences. And when I’m too self absorbed and serious about something that happened, for example with my family, I will share that incident with my husband or at an Alanon meeting, and in the sharing, (and when other people laugh), I find the comedy. Which is a relief!  

H. Were you a performer first or a writer?

TW. Good question! Considering the environment I grew up in, a large Irish Catholic working class family, (though the most important thing to my mom was to be saintly),  the most crucial thing to my dad was to be a comedian. We used to have to stand in front of the refrigerator when I was a kid and we were expected to perform something: we had to imitate Jimmy Durante, or John F. Kennedy, or James Cagney or Alfred Hitchcock and this was all to entertain my father. I was not good at any of these impersonations, especially since most of these people (except for JFK and Hitchcock) were from my parents’ generation, not mine. But if I could make my father laugh, I was successful. The writing for me came when I was a pre-teen—creating poems for my family’s birthdays, for Mother’s and Father’s Day, etc. Then once I read Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg, no one could stop me! The writing just poured out.

 H. What other projects are you working on?

TW. My next project is another one woman show which I have a lot of material written for, already. It’s going to be weird and hopefully hilarious stories about living in Santa Fe with New Age practitioners, and it’s also going to be about aging. Working title now is “New Aging!”

H. What do you want readers to get out of your writing?

TW. I hope my writing makes my readers laugh. I want them to feel as I do, that we’re all human beings trying to make it in this crazy world. I also hope my writing helps readers to learn about themselves and not feel so alone. I think the best writing lets us find out who we are.

H. What do you find most challenging about writing?

TW. I suppose what I find most challenging about writing is getting my butt in the chair to write! The blank page is always a bear, but it helps to teach and use Natalie Goldberg’s ideas of, “Put your pen on the paper; then go for ten minutes and it doesn’t have to be perfect.” I seem to have a nun in my head who is very critical, so I have to shut her up in order to get myself going!

H. Getting personal or memoir essays published is no easy task. How did you get your work into such a variety of publications?

TW. I think persistence is the only answer for this—I wish I had a secretary who would deal with all the business aspects of writing, but I don’t (though my husband has often been very helpful!) Writers can’t ever give up on getting our work out there. I always tell my students that great truth I heard from Antonya Nelson, I believe it was—to think of your writing as birds flying in and out of a bird cage. When a piece gets rejected, you send it out again. You try not to get discouraged when something does not get published; you just assume it will find its home somewhere else. The other thing that I heard another author say once is to think of marketing your writing as selling dog biscuits. You don’t get personally offended if your dog biscuits are not bought by someone. This, of course, is easier said than done!

H. What do you most want people to know about you?

TW. That I’m not perfect but I try hard! That (as Timothy Leary once said) “We’re all bozos on this bus!” That there is hope because most people have a core of goodness in them. That we’re all doing our best in this crazy world and humor helps. And that we all have important stories inside of us. 

H. Where can readers find Confessions of a Failed Saint?

TW. The easiest place to purchase my book is on Amazon.com, though it’s also at several bookstores in Santa Fe like Garcia St. Books, The Ark bookstore, and Op Cit books. If anyone has questions about my book or comments you want to share, my e-mail address is tmwilson222@aol.com. I’m also doing readings in Santa Fe at Santa Fe Community College on May 8, 5:30 p.m. in the Planetarium, and at The Ark Bookstore on Sat., May 25, from 3-5 p.m. I plan to be at the Book Fiesta in Albuquerque too, on May 10 and 11. 

 I do have a website that will direct you to my page on Facebook which is my blog: confessionsofafailedsaint.com. Or you can get on FB and go directly to my blog by typing in Confessions of a Failed Saint. I would love to hear your impressions of my book!

This interview is featured in Happenstance, a digital magazine with original stories, articles, poetry and more written by talents writers.

Writers and Writing: Alice Winston Carney

Writer’s Block airs every Tuesday, at 9 a.m. MST on KFUN/KLVF, streaming live at www.kfunonline.com

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On the Air with Alice Carney

Alice Carney and the Writing Life

Author and workshop facilitator Alice Carney seems more comfortable talking about everything under the sun, but herself. In our interview on Tuesday she revealed an enthusiasm for the subject of writing and kind of glazed over her own accomplishments. Below are her written responses to the questions I asked on Writer’s Block. She is an experienced writer and a wonderful communicator. Perhaps that comes from her 20-plus years as a Dale Carnegie instructor.

 

WB: Let’s begin by you telling us a little about yourself.

AWC: I grew up in Las Vegas and graduated from Robertson High School and Highlands University. I live in Sacramento, Calif., and, now that my husband Jim and I are retired, we spend part of the year at our place in Sapello. I have been a Dale Carnegie instructor for over 20 years and taught in the Communications Department at Sacramento State University. My favorite course to teach was Rhetorical Criticism because I worked deeply with the students on their writing, getting them to question the words they choose to use and the ideas they professed.

WB: Tell us about A Cowgirl in Search of a Horse.

AWC: A Cowgirl in Search of a Horse is a collection of stories about growing up in Las Vegas in the period between the end of WWII and the Vietnam War. One of my English professors at Highlands, Dr. Mallory, said one day in class, “If you don’t write down what happens to you, it will go away.” The stories in Cowgirl are a way to keep an earlier Las Vegas, as seen through my eyes, from going away.

WB: Have you always wanted to be a writer?

AWC: I have always enjoyed the idea of writing. I was lucky to have good English literature and journalism teachers from junior high through high school and college. Our seventh grade English teacher Tom Clark had us write weekly book reports that were limited to 50 words. I think that exercise taught me how to edit and get rid of all those extra words that clog up writing. Mrs. Lancaster at Robertson was a great journalism instructor, she encouraged us, but also critiqued in a way to make us better writers. I wrote for and edited my college newspapers and wrote for newspapers in New York and California. I have always kept a journal. I belong to a writers group in Sacramento.

I like to write, to work on the process of getting ideas across, playing around with words and telling stories. Does that make me a Writer? I still don’t know.

WB: What prompted you to start the Green River Writers Workshop?

AWC: I had been working on some of the stories that ended up in Cowgirl for a number of years but was not sure where to go with them. I took an on-line memoir writing course through Gothem Writers’ Workshops and that helped my skill level. I learned to be less general and to be more specific (for instance, to write about Las Vegas so that it does not come across as any small town but as a unique place with unique people living in it).

Then six years ago I attended a week-long memoir writing workshop in Taos with Natalie Goldberg, the author of Writing Down the Bones, a book I would recommend to anyone who is thinking about writing. That workshop was helpful on a general creative level, dealing with how to dig into your own experience and recreate it for the reader. There were 40 people at the workshop, most of them from out of New Mexico and no one except me from the other side of the mountains from Taos. I thought that Las Vegas would be a good place for a memoir writing workshop because there are so many stories to be told here. I literally had one of those flashes of insight: I could put on a writing workshop. My strength is in coaching and teaching and helping individuals and groups develop their ideas and skills, so I could do that part. I loved writing and had some experience, but not the deep publishing record that would be needed to give credibility to the workshop. I knew where to go for that.

I called my friends Gerry and Lorry Hausman who graduated from Highlands with me and now live in Florida. They are authors of over 75 books and have received national awards for several of those books. They are editors and publishers and gifted teachers. I asked them if they would like to come to Las Vegas the next summer and put on a memoir writing workshop with me. They did, and five years ago we held the first annual Green River Writers Workshop.

Since that first workshop we have also held workshops in Sacramento, Calif. and at the Fredericksburg Art School in Fredericksburg, Texas. We have people come from Las Vegas, Santa Fe, Silver City, New York, Colorado, Texas, Atlanta, Georgia, and this year we go international with Kenji Okuhira, a photo-journalist from Tokyo attending.

WB: Why did you select Las Vegas as the site?

AWC: Because we come here every summer, my family and friends are here, and because Las Vegas and northern New Mexico have such a rich cultural and creative history. I knew Las Vegas had an active writing and creative community from which to draw and I thought that the area would be an interesting destination point for writers from out of the area. You have a great bookstore in Tome on the Range and the Plaza Hotel has been supportive location for us.

WB: You keep it relatively small. Why is that?

AWC: We like the intimacy of a group that is 15 or less. We get to learn from each other through talking about writing and hearing each others work. Gerry and Lorry and I like the dynamic of a group this size.

WB: What do you want attendees to get out of the experience?

AWC: Our basic goal is for them to understand how to turn memory into story. In addition, our goal for beginning writers is confidence in their own voice, an awareness that their stories are interesting and should be written; the basic skills of good writing (for example, how to appeal to the reader, how to use active rather than passive verbs, what point of view works best). For experienced writers, to see them challenge themselves, take themselves to new levels. As with any creative work, with writing, there is always more to learn; when we stop leaning, we stop growing.

 The last day we focus on the rapidly changing and complex world of publishing. In addition to Gerry and Lorry’s and my experience, we will be bringing in Mina Yamashita, a writer,  book designer, and publisher to talk about  writing, designing and illustrating books in the digital age. 

Since our first workshop, several of the attendees have published books or are in the process of publishing. Joseph Baca (KFUN/KLVF owner) is one example.

Publication is not necessarily a goal for all members of the workshops, but for those who are looking in that direction, we offer expertise and guidance. We do believe that it is good to get your work out of your desk drawer (or off your computer) and into the light.

WB: There is an anthology of work by previous attendees. Let’s talk about that.

AWC: Green River Anthology, is a collection of the work of many of the workshop attendees over the past four years. We have had such good writing come out of the workshops, and we wanted that writing to be shared with a larger public. You will see a wide variety of writing styles and world views, poems as well as prose. We are proud of the level of writing in this anthology.

Several Las Vegans are included in the anthology: Petey Salman (my cousin), Maggie Romigh, Carol Ganyor, and Joseph Baca.

On Friday, July 20, from 5 to 6 we will be holding a reading and book signing of the anthology. It will be an enjoyable evening and a good way to learn more about your local writing community and support your local writers.

WB: What do you get from being a presenter?

AWC: Years ago, when I first started teaching, coaching, and running workshops, I thought about how lucky I was, because each time I work with a group of people and get to see them grow and develop their talents, I feel like I have fallen in love again. How many people get to fall in love several times a year?

WB: What is the one thing writers can do to improve their writing?

AWC: Write. As John McPhee said, "A writer writes." Read. You can’t be a good writer if you don’t read good writers. Develop the reading habit. Hang around with writers. Join a writing group. Take a workshop. Write.

WB: Anything last thoughts?

AWC: Whatever your creative urge is, writing, painting, drawing, music, photography, just walking in the woods, honor it. Remember your stories and find a way to share them before they go away. By sharing your story, you could make a difference in another person’s life.

The book signing for the Green River Anthology will be Friday, July 20, 5 p.m. at Tome on the Range.

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Poetry and Memoir, Life in Vignette

Writers’ Block guests on March 20 talked about the value of poetry as a writing form and essayist Cindy Charlton talked about memoir writing and her book signing on Saturday, March 24, 3 p.m. at Tome on the Range. Writers' Block streams live every Tuesday at http://www.kfunonline.com at 9 a.m. MST.

Shirley Blackwell and Georgia Santa Maria

Poetry does not appeal to everyone, perhaps because it is a much misunderstood medium of expression. New Mexico State Poetry Society President Shirley Balance Blackwell is trying to change that by bringing poetry into the modern age through technology and outreach. She and Georgia Santa Maria were as excited about promoting the Poetry Society as they were about promoting their work. Already There, Shirley’s book of poetry is available through her website. Georgia’s body of work has been published and includes both poetry and photography. Both read a poem from their books and each spoke about the value of belonging to writing groups.

Shirley has a lively personality, an obvious passion for poetry and a clear understanding of the importance of networking with other writers. A starting point for her was to revitalize the New Mexico State Poetry Society by increasing membership and improving its web presence. Originally from Deming, much of her career was in Washington, D.C. She returned to New Mexico as a result of her final assignment and now lives near Albuquerque with her husband and two rescue dogs. When asked, “Why Poetry,” she said, “Sometimes there’s no other way to live.”

The title, Already There, reminds the reader that much of what we’re looking for is there, sometimes right in front of us, we just need to be, as Shirley says, paying attention. Her poetry is wonderfully personal and covers the range from visionary to practical. In Upon Reflection she describes coming home with carefully chosen words and the way they visually appear on the page.

In Quantum Theology she writes:

“If poems were numbers and computers were infinite,

I would search for a magic algorithm of words

that-muliplied, magnified-would loop, swirl, and branch;

grow complexes of beauty; produce patterns truer

than I could devise but were there for the viewer.”

There’s more of this poem, but this verse gives you a sense of pacing and the exploration of a novel idea through the eyes of this inventive and creative poet. Her sense of what is and what can be come together in interesting ways. Whether she is writing about a mother-in-law with dementia, the discretion to keep silent about her happy marriage when everyone else is bemoaning the disappointment in theirs, or not being at her mother’s bedside at the time of her passing the words ring true and crystallize vignettes of life through the eyes of someone who has been there.

I recommend Already There whether you are a fan of poetry or someone who would like an introduction to a writing discipline that tells quick stories in lyrical form.

Georgia Santa Maria has a lovely laugh and appears to be innately cheerful. She read Santa Rosa from her book, Lichen Kiss, explaining the book title as coming from an image of a “Marilyn Monroe-like” pair of lips in red lichen growing on a boulder. As a photographer she was charmed by nature’s whimsy and felt that it would well-reflect her eclectic collection of poetry.

Georgia said in our interview that she believes poetry tells the truth and gets to the heart of ideas. “Poetry is internal music,” she said.

An artist and writer all her life, Georgia is a native northern New Mexican who has chronicled the landscape and life, both behind the camera and on the page.  Since 2010 she has made a conscious effort to, “… get my work out there and connect with other writers in my area. I have greatly enjoyed getting to know other writers and hear their work as well as sharing mine.”

She is working on a collection of her poetry, and a book about her experiences as a storekeeper in rural New Mexico.

To learn more about the Poetry Society and its upcoming state convention on April 28, go to New Mexico State Poetry Society.

Cindy Charlton: Family Caregivers, a Testament to Love

My good friend Cindy Charlton was my call-in guest. We only needed a cup of coffee in front to us to make the conversation complete, well that and being in the same room. Chatting with Cindy always makes me feel good. She is supportive of people who try and she shores up people who are struggling. I’m looking forward to getting Chicken Soup for the Soul, Family Caregivers, which contains One in a Million, an essay by Cindy. It is a personal account of her time as a caregiver for her terminally ill husband, Michael, which she was doing at the same time she was learning to live as a disabled person with new prosthetic legs.

Cindy has been writing about her personal experiences in her blog (accessible from her website), A Survivors Handbook, but writing for Chicken Soup for the Soul, Family Caregivers, proved to be a challenge. It was both emotionally taxing and healing. She said in reading the essays submitted by others, she found common experiences, and as difficult as these experiences were, the caregivers said they would not have missed out on these moments with their loved ones. The gifts they received became precious memories.

Cindy said she writes creative non-fiction, basically memoir writing, explaining that memoir describes a journey that shows how you’ve evolved into the person you are. “While it may be cathartic,” Cindy said, “it’s very hard to get down on paper.” One in a Million recounts a time just prior to her husband’s death.

“Writing about fighting my battle with disability and what I went thought isn’t as emotional and difficult as writing about Michael. You hurt for your loved one more than you hurt for yourself. You have to be the courage for the other person.” Cindy said Michael was her caregiver as well and remembers him as being unfailing in his attention. “I don’t remember him ever quaking at anything.”

Her remarkable story is a book all its own, but this piece in Chicken Soup for the Soul, Family Caregivers is especially close to her heart.

Be sure and set aside time on Saturday, March 24 at 3 p.m., to attend her book signing at Tome on the Range. She will also talk about her experiences and what it means to be caregiver for someone in the end stages of life.

Memoir and Historical Suspense on Tap for Tuesday

It’s safe to say that programming for Writers’ Block isn’t thematic. This week I’ll be featuring a writer whose memoir touches on subjects that remind us of what it was like being a kid and a fiction writer with a flair for historical suspense.

My in-studio guest will be David Perez, author of WOW!, a memoir about growing up in the South Bronx in the 1960s.

From the book’s website:

It’s the South Bronx of the 1960s, a neighborhood teetering on change. The young Puerto Rican boy is living in the housing projects, about to be transferred to Catholic school, where he’s already attended catechism and asked if God “popped out of nowhere.” So begins Pérez’s delightful and engaging “memoirito,” a novella-like tale that follows David trying his best to be “cool” in a neighborhood where being smart in school isn’t something to brag about.

Perez, who now lives in Taos, N.M., is an experienced public speaker, actor, writer, and editor. According to his web bio, he has done activist journalism and feature writing. “Our aim (at Workers World newspaper) was to promote and defend the rights of the working class and all people of color, to talk about Marxism and capitalism and the need for revolution.”

He supports and writes about the arts, cultural awareness and enlightenment and subjects close to his heart.

My call in guest is Mary Schwaner who writes under the pen name of Bailey Bristol. She published her first book in February and just released her second book, Devil’s Dime, which is the first in the Samaritan Files trilogy. It’s a late 1800s tale of suspense with a romantic twist. 

From Schwaner’s web bio:

Coloratura Soprano/Artistic Director/Programmer/Author: Granddaughter of a concert violinist, Mary began her musical career in elementary school with the family string quartet, but gave up the violin to study opera at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. There she performed many leading roles for the School of Music opera department before completing her Master’s Degree in 1971. The following year she represented Nebraska in the Regional Metropolitan Opera Auditions in Minneapolis.

Tune in on Tuesday, Dec. 13 at 8:45 a.m. (MST) to hear more from these talented authors. The program streams online at http://www.kfunonline.com.

 

Blessings in Disguise

Joseph Baca’s memoir, “Blessings in Disguise,” is equal parts history, family dynamics under stressful and sometimes violent circumstances, humor, spiritual awakening and inspiration. It is the story of one man’s life and how it was shaped by circumstances, but not defined by circumstances.

Baca is brutally honest about himself, his father’s brutality, his own mistakes, triumphs and joys. Despite times of darkness in his life Baca could always see the light ahead. In the book he credits his wife Loretta, with helping him see himself in a new way.

His dreams were more than dreams they were affirmations: “Good morning KFUN and KLVF hill, I love you and one day I am going to own you and you will be mine.” He started repeating that affirmation more than 20 years ago and eventually made it happen.

He also told his wife his Wednesday and Saturday lottery ticket purchases would someday bring in a million dollars. Apparently Joseph was the only one who wasn’t surprised when it happened.

“Blessings in Disguise,” begins with vignettes of Joseph Baca as a child. It details the verbal and physical abuse he received at the hands of a troubled father who turned his own demons on those closest to him. Joseph felt the brunt of that alcohol driven anger many times. It created an angry youngster who ended up finding trouble even when he wasn’t looking for it.

The memoir is touching, funny, heartbreaking and triumphant. It tells of Baca’s own struggle against the power of his past, which threatened to invade and take over his present and his future. He writes about the spirit that seemed to guide him past these dark times when anger and a feeling that his father was right when he said, “You’ll never be worth a damn and you’ll never accomplish anything in life.”

With grit and determination Baca has proven El Wille (his father) wrong, although that wasn’t his intent. His success is a blessing he counts with thanksgiving in his heart, not with revenge in his mind.

Baca said writing the book has been cathartic, allowing him to perhaps shine a light on his past and blow away the shadows that have haunted him for years.

“Blessings in Disguise,” is available at Tome on the Range in Las Vegas, N.M., and from the author. Baca will be the guest author at a reading and book-signing event at Tome on Saturday, Sept. 17 beginning at 3 p.m.